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Pulse Nigeria Poll: Readers say they will forgive a spouse who engages in extra-marital affairs

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A really worried man

49% of Pulse Nigeria Poll voters are of the view that it is right to forgive a spouse that cheats on them.

A worried reader, Paul, is devastated after he discovered that his wife, Iheoma, had been engaging in extra-marital affairs with other men and even got to the point of sending her nude photos to the men.

He is in a dilemma: as much he wants to keep his marriage, at least for the sake of the children, he has found it difficult to forgive Iheoma.

Read his letter here:

"My name is Paul and I have been married to Iheoma for the past six years, with two kids, a boy and a girl.

Though I cannot lay claim to being the best husband and father, I have never shirked in my responsibilities to my family, my wife especially. I work in a multi-media outfit that requires me to travel round the world and could be away for two to three months at a stretch, all in a bid to take care of my family and provide them with the best.

Anytime I am home, I make sure I spend good time with them to make up for my absence. When my job demands became so strenuous, I advised Iheoma to resign from her job and I opened a boutique for her so that she would have more time for the kids.

I did not know that I did the wrong thing because the boutique opened her up to meeting many people, including single women who became her friends and I believe, influenced her wrongly.

You would not imagine that I stumbled on some nude photos she sent to a man. I had just returned to Nigeria from France where I had gone to represent my company in a conference and was relaxing in the sitting room while Iheoma was in the kitchen preparing lunch. Her phone was on the table when a message came in. I

 was not used to checking her phone by the way but that day, out of curiosity, I picked it up and it was a Whatsapp message that came in.

On opening it, I saw a text that read:

'Baby, I must confess that you are hot babe and I can't seem to have enough of you. The last time was out of this world. When will hubby leave town again? I can't wait to have you screaming under me in the usual way.'

I did not know when I felt faint but I managed to scroll back to earlier exchanges and that was when I found out that my wife had been engaging in this extra-marital affair for many months and had sent more than 20 nude photos to the man.

I was shocked and switched off the phone and left the house. When I came back, I asked her if she had any affair with another man and typically, she denied vehemently and even picked up a fight. When I showed her the screen shots I had made of the messages and the nude photos, she broke down and confessed that it was loneliness that led her into the scandalous affair.

She has been begging me to forgive her but how can I forgive a woman who went that far?

Paul."

The teaser for the day was:

Would you forgive a spouse who engages in extra-marital affairs?

How Nigeria voted:

Yes, I will forgive him/her - 49%

No, I will never forget such a spouse - 11%

That will be the end of our marriage - 41%

What would be your vote here?



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